When I turned 21, I got my ears pierced. Most of my friends had pierced theirs in high school or even grade school. When I came home, my mother – who was 42 years older than me and grew up in a different time – frowned and said, “Only cheap women pierce their ears.” For much of my life, I believed the difficulties my mother and I had relating to one another were due to the over forty-year age difference between us. Most of my friends had grandparents who were my pare...
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Author: admin
Mary: The Unachievable “Ideal Woman”
“Well, that’s serious Catholics for you. All women should be both virgins and mothers if at all possible.” In this line of dialogue, fictional character Nate Spencer echoes something that confused me from the time I was old enough (about 11) to understand what being a virgin meant and put that together with the gospels.In mass and in hymns, Mary was often referred to as “ever virgin.” My parents and religion teachers told me Jesus had no brothers and sisters because Mary stayed...
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What I Learned About Religion From The Prince Of Darkness (Spirituality, Religion, and Philosophy, Entry 10)
I recently read Prince of Darkness by columnist Robert Novak. In part of the book, Novak talks about converting to Catholicism. In passing, he mentions how people “hostile” to Catholicism sometimes say “I was raised Catholic” when asked if they are Catholic. It never occurred to me saying this would be viewed as hostile. Saying “I’m a recovering Catholic” strikes me as a little hostile given that alcoholics use that terminology. But saying I was raised Catholic to m...
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Yoga, Life and Stretching (Spirituality, Religion, and Philosophy, Entry 9)
I find routines comforting. If I’m behind on my bookkeeping, or a client is unhappy with me, or I’m working 11 hours a day – or if all the above are happening at once – it helps me to eat the same kind of oatmeal each morning with a glass of the same kind of orange juice while I read the same newspaper (Wall Street Journal) for 10 minutes. Then I walk the same way to work and make the same type of tea (Earl Grey) when I get there before I sit down to start the stress/work wheel all o...
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Queen of Heaven (Spirituality, Religion and Philosophy, Entry No. 8)
When I was in second or third grade, my parents attended church every Tuesday night for a novena. The service focused on prayers to Mary, the mother of Jesus. I remember this going on indefinitely, but a search of the Catholic Encyclopedia and Wikipedia tells me novenas usually involve prayers for nine days in a row. We didn’t go every day, so maybe it was every week for nine weeks and only seemed endless because when you’re seven or eight years old that's how time passes. ...
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Does God Get Angry (Spirituality, Religion and Philosophy Entry No. 7)
When I was in junior high, a priest asked me during confirmation preparation why people shouldn't sin. I said it made God angry. The priest corrected me, saying God did not get angry -- that God is in heaven and is always at peace and does not feel human emotions like anger.This struck me as strange, given the Old Testament, with example after example of God getting angry. I thought first of the story of Noah and the flood. Now that I look at the verses, nothing literally...
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The Immaculate Conception And Cashing In (Spirituality, Religion, and Philosophy, Entry 5)
In 1854, the Pope declared that Mary, the mother of Jesus, was conceived without original sin -- the Immaculate Conception. In Catholic doctrine, original sin means the stain all humans inherit from Adam, whose first sin was disobedience. This sin supposedly is part of the human soul from the instant of conception. Only Mary, according to the Catholic Church, was conceived with no original sin.Popular culture, though, misunderstands the phrase Immaculate Conception to...
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Is Confession Good for The Soul? (Spirituality, Religion, and Philosophy, Entry 4)
As a kid, I found the Jesus dying for our sins concepts particularly disturbing. My parents’ church had a giant crucifix over the altar, with Christ on the cross, thorns in his head, face contorted. Not uncommon in Catholic churches, though some have a more peaceful looking Christ, or even show him as he is about to rise. I remember staring at the crucifix as I waited in line to go to confession. (For those not familiar with concept, in confession a person goes into a sma...
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Wishing to be Tense (Spirituality, Religion and Philosophy Entry 3)
During a scene in my favorite TV show (Buffy the Vampire Slayer), a British character, in a time of crisis, asks for coffee rather than his usual tea. The friend working with him asks why. Giles responds: “Tea is soothing, I wish to be tense.”
When I’m stressed at work or at home (but it’s usually at work), I sometimes say this to myself. It reminds me to stop choosing to be tense, or at least to recognize that’s what I’m doing. As someone who struggled with anxiety in the past, part of me...
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Women and the Church (Spirituality, Religion, and Philosophy, Entry 2)
Like a lot of Catholic teenagers, I started skipping mass in high school. I’d disappear for an hour on Saturday or Sunday at the appropriate time, but instead of going to church I headed to the park or to work out or to read. I didn’t disagree with the church’s teachings. I just didn’t see the point of mass. Sitting, standing, reciting (usually mumbling) the same words with everyone glancing at their watches. Ironically, now that I’m not a believer, I find great beauty in the ritual. I att...
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